Month: January 2014

‘Hunters’ of Asia

I turned on Facebook earlier this evening and – wait, wait, wait – turned on? That’s an odd way to talk, Dom. You sound like you’re a grandmother.

Alright, logged on then. Is that better?

Ehhh.. just say, “I went on Facebook. That’s all you need.”

… So… So, I went on Facebook earlier this evening… I mean, I go on Facebook everyday, multiple times per day. It’s not like today was a special day for Facebooking or anything. No, it was a regular day. Facebook is boring now. Have you noticed that? Maybe I’ve just exhausted my patience for other peoples bullshit. If I want to read about a bunch of bullshit I can just log onto my own site (har, har, har).

(more…)

Tales of the Spanish Girls

There were a few months from 2012 to 2013 when I traveled with a group of Spanish girls. I met them through a German friend of mine and it always impressed me how they could stand to travel together for longs periods of time. They were five. Three sisters, each half-Spanish, half-Saudi (a very attractive combination), one of their Spanish friends, and a Colombian girl who lived in Spain. Five girls traveling together for months through some of the dirtiest places on Earth.

(more…)

In a World… (2013)

9/10 – Grilled Seal of Approval

in-a-world-poster_612x907

Hello, Lake Bell!

I never would have guessed you had something like this inside your mind! I have to admit that I am not the biggest Lake Bell fan. First of all, she was on Surface, a show about watery creatures or aliens or some shit like that, I don’t really know cause I never watched it. But the commercials were always on TV – SURFACE!! – accompanied by gurgling water noises and the – BUM BUM – noise that means This Show Has Some Creepy Supernatural Weird Shit In It – BUM BUM. You know the sound, I don’t need to act it out.

(more…)

The Spectacular Now (2013)

9.5/10 – Grilled Seal of Approval

The_Spectacular_Now_5

Alright, I understand I’m getting a bit of a reputation around these parts because I rated two 2013 high school coming of age dramedies the very, very high score of 9.5/10. The Spectacular Now and The Kings of Summer. “What does this mean, Dom? Are you trying to make up for your own shitty high school experience by vicariously living through a movie? Do you regret doing nothing in high school except watching movies, and no, we’re not joking, we really mean NOTHING BUT WATCHING MOVIES, ya damn slag!”

(more…)

Sid & Nancy (1986)

8.5/10 – Grilled Seal of Approval

SID-NANCY

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT DRINK FUCK ATTACK SHIT FIGHT FUCK ATTACK DRINK DRINK ATTACK MUSIC  ATTACK DRINK DRUGS DRINK DRUGS FIGHT ATTACK DRINK DRUGS FUCK FUCK DRINK DRUGS ATTACK ATTACK

Much of this movie feels like someone is standing next to you screaming in your ear. And I mean that in the very best way possible. I am frightened to see people acting this way in front of my eyes. It’s something I can’t comprehend. It’s something foreign and abrasive. But so much energy! I want to jump into the crowd and thrash around, throwing out my elbows and socking someone in the face, blood billowing into the air like a cloud above the spitting mass, writhing together like a thousand dying… octopuses.

(more…)

Transitory Relationships and ‘Weekend’ (2011)

9/10 – Grilled Seal of Approval

weekend-poster

A nice little gay love story for the whole family. No, really it’s great. Realistic, passionate, well-acted, and involving. The plight of two gay men who only have a handful of hours to spend together before one of them leaves the country. I can identify. I’ve been there. No, I’m not gay (well, probably not), but I am an old soul when it comes to brief, wonderful, and transitory relationships.

(more…)

Happiness (1998)

10/10 – Grilled Seal of Approval

4143597_orig

Wow. By far the greatest movie ever made about pedophilia (I’m assuming, it’s not like I specifically set out to watch movies about pedophilia [although I did just see Hard Candy as well…]). Incredibly dark and disturbing, but god damn is it funny. This is black black black comedy at its finest. A world so cruel and bizarre and amazing that it stops being a story and transforms into a horribly realistic portrayal of dysfunction.

(more…)

Straw Dogs (1971)

8/10

MPW-73387

I saw the 2011 remake of Straw Dogs in the theater. I was in the middle of a random city in the middle of nothing and nowhere Pennsylvania for a two night work-sponsored educational trip. It was a slow night and everyone else wanted to sleep, so I headed out into the shit and found my way to a movie theater. I had never heard of Straw Dogs at that point – which was unusual since I’m often informed about every single thing that will be arriving in theaters. But I paid it no mind because it was the only movie starting soon and it was the one I would be watching. The 2011 remake of Straw Dogs  will forever live on in my mind  –

AS ONE OF THE WORST MOVIES OF ALL TIME

(more…)

Frances Ha (2012)

9.5/10 – Grilled Seal of Approval

frances_ha_xlrg

Truly the kind of film you want to live inside, with the people you want to know, and doing things you want to do. Greta Gerwig is excellent excellent excellent. The whole cast is excellent. Adam Driver is becoming reliably excellent. Noah Baumbach is becoming one of my favorite directors. Ooooooooh. And also, on this day (which is actually the 14th not the 6th as I am still trying to catch up), on this day – my FIRST OFFICIAL PAYING ARTICLE WAS PUBLISHED. So, fuck yeah! Dreams of Brooklyn nights and skyscapers and hobos huddling together in the cold and stepping carefully through half thawed pools of sludgy sludge ice and snow and salt and grime mixture and the wind whipping down through the long corridors of my buildings, up my coat, through my hair and back into the sky like a hawk flitting through the air after a kill. Brooklynnnnn. Concrete jungle where dreams are made of, Brooooooooooooklyn stand up! When I move you move (just like that?), when I move you move (just like that?), when I move you move (just like that?) hell yeah mutha fucka now bring that ass back!

(more…)